the fire of motherhood

I had learned that motherhood is near torture and family rearing does not tickle my fancy. My observations made me feel like everything that was me was going to be ripped from my soul and I would become a horrible, screaming nightmare.

Recently I flew across the country to help my aunt take care of her newly born son. Though it can be difficult, I learned that motherhood doesn't have to be soul-sucking.

In fact, it could be quite cool.

Dexter

I learned that discipline makes well-behaved children, teasing can be encouraged, and that I should more often keep a bag of fish crackers and pretzels in my purse. That babies have personalities, post-partum (though difficult) is normal, the reasons for time-out should always be discussed, and I should laugh heartily when my two-year-old says he likes my body.

Pooping on the potty brings fruit snacks, breast-feeding is anything but natural, early bed time is awesome, and refusing to let my baby sleep in my bed doesn't mean I don't love him, but simply that I want a good night's rest.

Tell my kids I love them, explain the real names of things, and expect them to do for themselves what they are capable of. Build their confidence, construct their character, foster their faith, and gain their trust.

Though, once again, reality has hit, I'm not so tentative now. It's more like hopeful yet okay-with-the-fact-that-it's-pretty-far-down-the-road.

I was really sad to leave. I'm going to miss my aunt and her kids.

I suppose that the little fire she kindled in my heart when I was six that made me want to be just like her has again began to glow.

Atticus